In 5 steps to oneThey-lived-long-and-happy mindset
Love is a game in which both partners are actively involved. Just like in a compelling party game, it’s all about the constant interaction of action and reaction. That is part of the game. But there is another parallel between the ‘game of love’ and a successful party game: the specific mindset of each player.
What we often forget is that something invisible precedes such an exciting round monopoly. An invisible, mental preparation takes place in the brain of each player.
Your ‘game brain’: an evidence
When we play a game, we switch to a specific setting that belongs to the game. Imagine playing monopoly with your loved one, with whom you just had a glass of wine. Suddenly this person becomes your big competitor, and your brain switches to strategic thinking and selfishness. The bad luck of the other is your profit, and suffering entertainment only makes the game more fun. Without this mental switch, the game would never be so exciting.
Just as Monopoly requires its own ‘ideal mindset’, so love also needs its own mental attitude to flourish. And it starts in your own head, just like with a game.
put youLove brainto
The right mindset makes it easier to experience happiness in love. However, a negative mindset can poison your relationship and prevents beautiful moments from being really experienced as positive. Negative thoughts and hidden beliefs about love can turn our love life gray.
Mental update
Do you have the right thoughts and beliefs to fully embrace the happiness in love? A healthy mindset is also essential as a single. Whether you find happiness together depends of course on several factors, but the right mindset with each of the partners is an indispensable basic condition. The good news? You can control this mindset yourself! Here are five key mental updates to optimize your ‘relationship mindset’:
- Cherish your unique love story
Realizes how valuable it is to share your life with someone you have chosen and who has chosen you. Whether you believe in coincidence or if it was ‘meant to be’ – your match is a miracle in itself! Cherish this story and keep it in mind regularly. It gives you the strength to keep fighting for your relationship. - Real love does not happen automatically
Do you secretly dream of a relationship that goes smoothly? Adjust this ideal image. Just as a car needs maintenance, a good relationship requires dedication and effort. If you accept this, you are better prepared to stay calm when things are not running smoothly, and you can work constructively on improvement, without reproach. - Embrace positive dependence
The modern ideal of independence can be a murderer for a close relationship. Dare to need each other for support, intimacy and connection. Positive dependence does not mean that you constantly need each other or have no identity without the other. It means that you are open and acknowledge that you need your partner for essential needs such as comfort, closeness and acceptance. - Be emotionally open
Dare to show yourself in your vulnerability. Introduce your loved one to your fears, desires and even the sides that hides you from the outside world. If you do not allow your partner completely, real intimacy is missing, even if you are physically close. - See crisis moments as opportunities for growth
Happy couples have moments of crisis just as often as unfortunate couples. The difference is in the way these moments are used. Use conflicts to create more connection, instead of seeing them as a threat. In this way crises strengthen the resilience of your relationship.
It is now up to you to do a mental update of your love brain! On which points can your relationship mindset use a refresh?
The correct updated mindset is your best asset in the game of love – an essential basis that will set your relationship to endure every challenge.
By consistently implementing these five mental updates of your love brain, your relationship experience can undergo a 180-degree transformation in no time – without your partner having to do anything for it. How beautiful is that?